Add Me?

It’s a bugger of a thing, friendship when you’re housebound for years. It’s hard to keep a dialogue going with the friends you made in your old life. Especially if you are too unwell to participate fully in conversations. Luckily the world comes to you these days. You can make new friends without going anywhere at all. Enter stage-left the Online Buddies…

Good old online buds eh? The ones you meet on social-networking sites or forums. So handy for those hundreds of weekends watching the Coronation Street omnibus, pretending this is definitely how you envisaged spending your twenties… Online friends can be a total life-line when you are isolated from the outside world. Nobody expects you to stop needing friendship just because you can’t participate in life face to face. I just want to add a few provisos before you get started…

The first one is the most important. Please, please, please don’t meet them on “I’m housebound too dot com” websites. Seriously please stay the hell away from them. Having people to commiserate with feels good for about a minute-then you find yourself locked in an endless cycle of discussing symptoms and talking about illness. And whilst there’s not much I don’t believe in- I do not believe you can get to a place of wellness from there.

I definitely recommend you choose your friends wisely. If you want to join forums join a sports one (no I’m not taking the p*ss, honestly) or a travelling one. Anything that excites you about the life outside of yours. Start living your recovery now, today, as if it’s already happening-even if it is just taking place in your head

Lie your ass off. Tell the people on there you too are training for a triathlon/bodybuilding/spending a year in South America. Then wait til you start dreaming about it too rather than spending your dreams in your bed/chair. You’ll know you’ve turned a corner then. I know I did.

Thing is as ridiculous as my way sounds, it actually works. I’m a walking testament to that. Literally. Unlike the people I know who did it the other way. People just like me, in my exact situation.They may be slightly less deluded in their approach than l-but they are all still housebound. Six years on. all of them still waiting to get better. Still on the forums commiserating with peers on their misfortune. And it is unfortunate. It’s bloody tragic. No one should have to go through what they are going through. Not ever. So let’s start changing the outcome now.

I want you to get well quickly and permanently. I believe its entirely possible. And I honestly believe if you do it in your head first then your body catches up. Give it a go…make a new friend that will enhance your own recovery. You can improve your social situation without leaving your room if you aren’t up to it yet. So much is possible now the we are all connected online. Just make sure that when you “Add Them” you are also adding to your arsenal of recovery, not finding co-conspirators to stay sick with…



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