Monthly Archives: February 2012

Fancy a Challenge?

Something strange happened to me a few weeks ago- I met a man who was happier than me.

Happier. Than me.

This is not a situation that I’m used to. Not with Happy As A Clam being my default setting since getting my life back and learning how to enjoy it.

As if to add insult to injury he also looked way better than me. We were the same age but he looked years younger, his skin was flawless, his hair was shiny, his eyes were bright.

Damn him.

But it wasn’t even his obvious physical health that stood out the most. He was completely relaxed and totally happy with himself. When I asked him why this was he simply said “I have total inner-peace now, I don’t need or crave anything anymore”.

Well that would do it I suppose.

The man I’m referring to is Dean Howell, known to many as a Left Back for Crawley Town F.C. What I didn’t know was as well as being a professional footballer, he owns a company called Revolution Foods a website that provides natural foods, herbal supplements and other health and well-being aides.

Dean follows a plant-based diet with an emphasis on Alkaline foods ( a comprehensive list of the range of the food he chooses from can be found here.) What I liked most about Dean’s approach to a healthy lifestyle is the manner in which he comes across. He clearly knows his stuff, but doesn’t blind you with technical jargon. That and the fact that he doesn’t sit behind a desk lecturing people. He’s a professional athlete and this lifestyle works for him so he really puts his money where his mouth is.

After chatting with him I felt totally uplifted, and to be honest more than a little bit of “I’ll have whatever he’s having please” was going on in my head. Luckily for me this nice man gave me loads of herbs to take home with me and try for myself. I have to say as soon as I started taking them, not only did I feel a big difference but my skin totally changed colour, the circles under my eyes disappeared and my skin felt baby-soft.

The man is a magician if you ask me.

So Lucky Me I get lots of lovely herbs, but also Lucky You because starting March 1st Revolution Foods is doing a 30 day challenge and inviting everyone to get involved. So if you fancy giving yourself a bit of a boost and a nutritional makeover for March then pop over and sign up! Revolution Foods are offering help and guidance for the entire challenge, recipes, breathing and toning exercises and updates to your email account.

The challenge itself consists of a 30 day introduction to a diet without meat. dairy or soy products. Although to be honest putting it that way doesn’t really do it justice, because in all honesty the secret to Dean’s success doesn’t seem to be in what he’s cutting out at all, it’s what he’s added to his life and lifestyle that makes his way so attractive. And why I think he will succeed in bringing nutritional changes to the Mainstream where many may not.

See you there! I’ll be the one with hair envy…



I Promise

I think with any type of recovery there are times when you just hit a wall. When you know the only real way out is through, even if you have no idea where it’s going to lead you. Times when you’ve changed so much that you do not recognise the person you’ve become-and no one else recognises you either. Where you feel like a little alien navigating your way through a world that has completely changed in your absence. Sometimes I still feel that way. If this is how you are feeling right now then I want you to take these promises and keep them with you:

I promise you are on your way to places bigger and better than anywhere you’ve been before your Journey to Wellness began.

I promise that the people who don’t feel like the right fit in your life anymore will be replaced by the best friends you could ever ask for.

I promise that the confusion will go away and you’ll be left with a sense of self so clear that nothing will ever shake it.

I promise that if you don’t know or have just forgotten how to act in a certain situation, then faking it always works. I also promise that you won’t be the only one doing it.

I promise that after what you’ve been through, life is going to seem like one big game from now on.

I promise you will Love like you have never Loved before.

I promise you this happiness you get brief glimpses of every now and then will soon become a permanent state of Being.

I promise you that the the thought of death will no longer scare you, or the thought of illness. But most importantly the thought of Living won’t scare you either.

I promise that the fear will go away.

C xx

Did I Make Myself Clear?

We all have this one friend. A person who lights up a room just by being in it. Who is so full of enthusiasm for life that having a conversation with them is like plugging yourself into the mains. We leave their side feeling like we can take on the world. That friend who is like a magnet constantly attracting the best things life has to offer. The one that is always laughing, and is always surrounded by people. That person we always want to sit next to. The one who makes life look fun and totally effortless. That one whose life is really a work of art because they are so good at it. They don’t seem to even see obstacles, just more and more opportunities for fun and growth and joy.

What we don’t always know is how that person got to be this way. Some people are born like this. Some learn through self-help books or self-improvement seminars or what have you. Then there are the ones who didn’t know how to make life work for them. Who never felt successful or good enough. The people who were always the unhappiest in the room, the ones you’d gladly sell your own Grandmother not to sit next to. The ones whose glasses were permanently half-empty, and who just sat around whingeing waiting for someone else to come fill it up for them.

Until they hit a crisis point. I think it’s so accurate that the Chinese symbol for Crisis is the same one as Opportunity. Because sometimes a total crisis is what it takes to turn a Life completely around. Sometimes we have to go as far down as we can go into despair for us to be able to let go of every pattern of thought and behaviour that was keeping us as this sad, unhappy small person. Sometimes that’s just what it takes.

I get a lot of stick from people for saying that being in a Wheelchair was the best thing that ever happened to me. I make no apologies for that. I still think that it was. It woke me up. It made me realise what a total waste my life had been up til that point. For me it took something that drastic to sort me out. To make me see that life is truly a gift and that I can do anything I want to do and be anyone I want to be, that I create my own life and I’m responsible for everything in it. To really know this as a fact and my ultimate Truth and to live in this knowledge everyday.

I’m not saying it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to you. I don’t get to decide that. I’m not saying that you even have to get well if you don’t want to. That’s your choice not mine. But I do want to be clear that I don’t believe it takes being in a Wheelchair to change a Life. That a Life After can begin anytime we choose it to. That we can become that person who enjoys every moment, the one who lives and loves fearlessly. That it can happen for anyone at anytime. Just by letting go of the excuses and letting in the Good.

I created my Life After because I had to. I don’t think it matters if you are creating your own Life After out of choice or out of Crisis. No one gets a prize for having the more dramatic story. But if you want to join me and the other’s that I’ve met on this Journey then great, let me know, I’m here to help in any way that I can, that’s why I set this place up. If you’re not ready, that’s ok too, just let me know when you are.

Because really that friend that we all love to be around is a lot easier to become than we think. All we need to do is look for the good, become obsessed with Happiness, make Joy our goal. An intolerance to unhappiness is all it takes to discover our own love of life.

If you want to stay where you are because even though you’re unhappy, The Known still makes you feel safe then that’s okay too. But let me make myself clear. It’s way nicer over here, whether you get here via a wheelchair or not. And I’d really like your company. I’m not claiming to be that charismatic friend that lights up a room by being in it-but no one over here is going to stop you from being that person anytime you choose, and that’s definitely someone I’d like to have around. And if we keep reaching out to each other, giving each other a hand to hold on this Journey to Wellness, then it’s going to make this Path easier for us all to travel.


When there are no words

Tonight I went for a walk in the snow.

I walked.

In the snow.

I dressed myself, left my own flat hundreds of miles away from the bed I lay in, or the chair I was pushed around in. I dressed myself in clothes that I paid for, from a job that I love. And I walked down 2 flights of stairs. And I went out into the snow. And I walked.

The great thing about walking in snow is that you can see your footprints. Like there’s actual evidence that the walking is real, and it’s definitely you that’s doing it. Alone, unaided.

I walked and I walked and I didn’t even have to think about putting one foot in front of the other. Or whether I would reach a certain point and get too scared and have to turn back or ask for help.

Sometimes there is too much to appreciate. Too much to take in. Not enough words to convey how staggeringly grateful a moment can make you. I get those moments a lot. I never had them before my Life After and at first I didn’t really know how to deal with them. Now I just say Thank You. Over and over and over. I say thank you until it should totally lose its meaning and just seem like a sound. But it never is.

Thank You for letting me fall in love with my life more times a day than I can count.

Thank You for making me the kind of person who can’t tolerate being more than a minute away from feeling Joy.

Thank You for the Love that Saved me that day all those years ago as I lay dying on my floor.

Thank You for bringing me back and letting me share that love with everyone I meet.

Thank You.

Doesn’t even matter if I don’t know who I’m even thanking. It just feels right.

So when you don’t know the words to say, take my advice and just say Thank You. A lot.

C xx